To Be a Lady

What designs a lady? Could it be morals? Monetary possession? Style? Beauty? 

Perhaps. Who am I to say? 

Only the more I think, the more I wonder. What makes a lady? What truly, truly fashions her and elevates her from the rest of womankind? 

Some things cannot be comprehended without a partner. How can one describe salt without pepper? Or leaf without tree? Or petal without rose? Can a lady ever be analyzed without first recognizing a gentleman?

gent·le·man (/ˈjen(t)lmən/): a chivalrous, courteous, or honorable man.


A gentleman is always thought of in favorable terms. His notable qualities—in a relationship—might include the following:

  • Holding the door 
  • Paying for dates
  • Showing up on time
  • Saying kind words
  • Remaining consistent 
  • Pursuing respectfully
  • Respecting boundaries

A girl’s heart desires qualities to admire, qualities that make her feel as if she’s met a gentleman. So what does a gentleman seek in a woman? What can she do—or not do—to meet the standard of a lady?

The controversial trend of independence has ruined us. The woman race has taken such great pride in “independence” that we inadvertently push away the qualities that make us a lady. The femininity movement, the Women’s Rights, the attitude that a woman can do anything a man can do…

How silly we’ve all become. To be a lady, a woman must compliment a gentleman. 

Be meek. Be kind. Be gentle. 

Let him be the man God created him to be. Let him show you his strength. Let him hold the door for you. Let him pay for the meals. Let him pursue you…and don’t pursue him.  

In essence, being a lady is weaved with many different threads: wisdom, modesty, meekness, kindness, tenderness, the ability to take the part God has designed for us to take. There is no disgrace in taking such a part, only honor. 

Honor, I daresay, of the greatest kind. 

Hannah Linder is a Christian fiction author, graphic designer, and photographer.


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